Yeah, it's the yacht.
Just when we thought it was safe to go back in the water with Tiger Woods.
There's the yacht.
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Wonder why we can't entirely wrap our arms around Tiger Woods even as we kind of, sort of want to as he hits another leg on his redemption tour, namely next week's U.S. Open at Shinnecock Hills Golf Course on Long Island, out in the Hamptons?
Ahoy.
According to the New York Post, Woods has parked his 155-foot, $20 million yacht (name: "Privacy") at a basin not far from the course.
We now return you to you regularly scheduled underdog saga.
Every time I want to go all Eldrick all over again, I read something like this.
Does this guy not get it? How about some self-awareness? Just a little.
Really, it's just a small reminder that in sports, at the top of sports, there is us and there is them.
It's the same way as we watch LeBron shoot or Clayton Kershaw pitch, or Tom Brady throw, or any other famed athlete do anything else.
There is us and there is them.
We do not live in their world. In fact, we'd be stopped at the security fence if we tried to get into it.
Would you let Tiger Woods poke through your handbag? This Clearwater woman did Friday https://t.co/JT12YyvIR8 @TigerWoods #pga #valspar @MikeSherman pic.twitter.com/lqDgnQPK1T
— TampaBayTimesSports (@TBTimes_Sports) March 9, 2018
Woods remains an enticing story as he tries to climb back into winning golf. I wouldn't rule him out of winning the Open, which he once won by 15 strokes at Pebble Beach.
Then he had to take his yacht to this year's Open.
How do you build an underdog out of that?
There is us and there is them.
It has always been that way. But this is a grisly reminder, even though Woods earned every penny he made.
I'm not saying I wanted him to use public transportation. Might have been a nice touch, though. TIGER TAKES BUS TO OPEN.
Instead, Woods' yacht reportedly features five bedrooms, a gym, a lounge and — wait for it — two wall safes.
Golfers do not sign autographs while they are playing a round. Especially Tiger Woods, even during the pro-am. Well, unless you're a really cute kid with a really cool T-shirt. @TB_Times @TomWJones @ValsparChamp @Innisbrook https://t.co/lMSU4Wf5FC
— TampaBayTimesSports (@TBTimes_Sports) March 8, 2018
Try and build a heartwarming, rags-to- riches comeback story out of that.
Understand, Tiger bought the yacht when he was raking in $100 million a year. He bought it for his now former wife. They spent their wedding night aboard it.
Repeating: There is us and there is them.
The Open, with its unforgiving rough, can be a torture test, hard to watch.
Tiger could change all that. When he goes, golf goes with him. Author and HBO personality Armen Keteyian just co-wrote a biography on Tiger. Keteyian was promoting the book during a radio interview and he hit it right on the head.
"Tiger doesn't move the needle," Keteyian said. "He is the needle."
Like he said.
But then there's the yacht.
Tiger Woods didn't win, but Tampa Bay did, columnist @TomWJones says https://t.co/IXzg2zewjQ @ValsparChamp @PGATOUR #TigerWoods
— TampaBayTimesSports (@TBTimes_Sports) March 12, 2018
Look, our president has bathrooms with gold inlay in his New York pad. What of it? Boxer Floyd Mayweather makes $100 million a fight. Soccer star Lionel Messi makes about $1 million a goal. Golden State Warriors shooting star Steph Curry makes about $3 million every two weeks. How's your paycheck coming along?
I've never begrudged our sports entertainers the lifestyles of the rich and famous. The market is the market. And I know is that Jack Nicklaus was a millionaire many times over when he won the 1986 Masters at age 46 – and it was one of the great sports stories.
The story is the story, no matter who's making it or how much he or she makes.
So, I'll be transfixed by Woods if he makes a run at Shinnecock. Beautiful people will swoon. Poems will be written, and we'll read them. Tiger will draw us in. He's the needle, after all.
A Tiger win at the U.S. Open would reduce him, and maybe a few of us, to tears.
And then he'll go back to his $20 million yacht.
Sigh.
Contact Martin Fennelly at [email protected] Follow @mjfennelly